Great Speaking Coach

Don't Make Your Audiences Pay for Your Desire for Immediate Rewards

Will you practice your speech or presentation standing up and out loud or go to another meeting to talk about sales, technology or innovation? About 75% of you will pick the meeting over the practice. This is what behavioral researchers call "hyperbolic discounting" or, for us mortals, preferring immediate rewards over long-term gains. You expect an immediate result from the meeting, while if you spend that time practicing, you'll have to wait until you give the speech to find out if the audience likes it.

A client recenly told me with awe and amazement in his voice that practicing his speech ten times, out loud and standing up, made a huge difference in how he delivered it to his audience. His typical protocol was to read the slides over a couple of times, make a few notes, and then get up and speak. The ten practices (following just a couple of hours of working with me on the slide content and speaking notes) allowed the speech to flow from within. He felt it and the audience responded to it with applause, laughter in the appropriate places, and many congratulations. He accepted the delayed gratification and received abundant reward in return.

1-Make appointments on your calendar for your practices. You won't practice if you hope to squeeze them in during your "free time." No one has free time these days or if you have an opening someone will be sure to request your presence at a meeting or teleconference.

2-Stand up and speak out loud. Your brain registers your oral content differently from the way it registers when you're just thinking it through. You hear your words, the connection between ideas becomes clear and glitches or difficult thoughts become apparent and you can fix them.

3-If you need an immediate reward in order to make the time for practices, give yourself one in the form of a coffee break, a walk, a call to a friend or a creative conversation.

No one takes practicing seriously before they do it the first time. It is hard to imagine an outcome you've never experienced before. So you have to take the risk the first time that practicing will make a difference. After the first speech is received better than any you've ever given before, you'll have a much easier time practicing the next speech or presentation.

Now that you're aware of 'hyperbolic discounting' or the inclination to get immediate rewards instead of delayed rewards, you can overrule your brain! Practice, practice, practice--and reap the rewards from an appreciative audience.

 

 

Overconfidence May Be Making You a Poor Business Speaker

Don't we all wish to be supremely confident? Never worrying about whether we'll remember our speech or presentation, believing that we are just the right weight and wear the very best clothes for us, and knowing we'll make a speech that leaves the audience cheering on their feet?

Gary Belsky and Thomas Gilovich, authors of the behavioral-economics book "Why Smart People Make Big Money Mistakes" ask people questions that appear straightforward--but they aren't. They point out that overconfidence makes these people believe they don't need other information, so they don't ask for it. Their answers turn out to be incorrect. This is certainly a problem for investors, and I think it's a problem for business speakers.

When business speakers and presenters have overconfidence in their speaking skills, they end up stuck at their college level speaking skills even as they climb the career ladder. They ask for coaching and then respond "I know that" and proceed to do whatever they were doing before they got the advice. Overconfident speakers believe they can skim their slides or notes a few minutes before going on and they'll be fine. They let other people write their content for them, assuming that a standard message will be meaningful to every audience.

Overconfidence is a reputation-killer! When you're boring, reading your slides or notes, and delivering a message that's all about you and your interests, you're teaching people to stay away from you. When you never make time to practice and rehearse (two different focuses) your audiences know it immediately. When you say "I can speak about anything" your audiences are thinking "yeah, he or she speaks about everything but knows nothing!"

Confidence is helpful to raising the standard of your speaking skills. Confidence in your knowledge, your passion and your authenticity are critical elements. Confidence that you know the audience and will speak about the topic in ways they want to hear is much appreciated. Confidence that your voice will carry, that your gestures will be unobtrusive and your movement around the speaking platform will enhance, not distract, is good.

Overconfidence is when you believe you are bringing all these qualities to your speeches and presentations and you are not! Work with an adviser or a coach--someone who has nothing to lose by telling you the truth--and become confident, while avoiding overconfidence. Your audiences will reward you.

 

Use Loss Aversion Instinct as a Persuasive Speaking Technique

"We feel the pain of losing twice as much as we fell the pleasure of winning" say behavioral economists. This is called "loss aversion" and it influences us greatly when faced with decisions. I think there are several uses of the instinct for loss aversion that business speakers should keep in mind when they're persuading an audience to take action.

1) Compare the impact of potential losses to the impact of potential successes. It's great to talk about the steps to success and as a dyed-in-the-wool optimistic, I like to think, write and speak that way. However, the majority of our audiences will be more likely to take action to avoid loss than they will to gain a success. Losses feel more immediate and concrete while success is ephemeral and may take time to attain.

2) Ask the audience to imagine a scenario that ends badly. Get them to feel the effects physically and emotionally. Invite them to discuss their vision with their neighbor. "Imagine you've lost track of the runway at a strange airport because you were talking to your passenger. Suddenly the end of the runway is there and your airspeed is too fast to stop." Ask "what happens to you, your passenger and your aircraft? What will you do differently next time (if there is a next time)?"

3) Create an image of the city, state, country or the world where you do business. How will inaction hurt each of them personally? (All business outcomes affect individuals.) The highest executives and the most junior personnel have something to lose by: poor customer service, defective products, lagging technology, and other issues. Instead of asking people to DO things, talk about what could happen if they don't do them. Your call-to-action about DOing better will resonate much more strongly.

I urge my clients to read widely--way beyond their own area of expertise, their business or their job title--to learn tips from other industries. That's why I read about behavior in all kinds of settings. In this case it was an article about how people make financial decisions that are antithetical to their own interests. it struck me as I read this article that speakers should be keeping these ideas in mind as they craft their speeches and presentation.

What do you read that has influenced your speaking?

 

 

It's Not Enough to Know...You Must DO!

"I know there are differences between practices and rehearsals but I don't have time to do it" said an attendee at one of my recent workshops "How to Be a Speaker Your Audience Wants to Hear".

How many times have you thought, "yeah, I know that" and then had to admit that you never apply what you know? You typically use one of two excuses: 1) I don't have time or 2) that's not the way we do things around here.

Accumulating knowledge is easy! Look it up online, post a query to your social network or take a class,webinar or teleseminar. Poof! now you KNOW!

Knowledge that is never applied is like paying your gym membership and never going. You know you belong, but you never apply the benefits you've paid for.

I'm always puzzled by the number of people who expect that I'll give them a magic potion they can swallow so they can suddenly be the speaker or presenter they want to be. I give many magic potions--my two foundation principles Put the Audience First and Be Yourself, Polished, plus urging them to budget their time so they spend at least 50% practicing and rehearsing are among them--and they walk away thinking "I know that."

It's not enough to know--you must DO. Apply one tip you learn from me and see what happens. The magic is really internal to you, however it takes deliberate effort to locate it and apply it.

Do you want to be a speaker your audiences rave about and are eager to listen to again and again? Remember this: Only Speaking is Speaking.

This means that talking about speaking, writing about speaking, making slides about speaking and taking workshops about speaking is not speaking. You must speak to get better. Make the time speak and stop saying "thats not the way we do things around here."

Only Speaking is Speaking. When you speak you will become a better speaker. The more you speak, the better you will become. Instead of rejecting an expert's recommendations because you already know them, apply what you know.

You have the magic power within you to become the speaker your audiences want to hear.

Take action: engage me for one-on-one coaching and small group workshops.